Thursday, August 19, 2010

Long Distance Sweethearts

When I left for college the thing I was most anxious about wasn't making new friends, living in the dorms, or the academic transition to college (though they were all close runner ups), I was scared witless about deciding to stay in a relationship with my high school boyfriend who is going to school 3000 miles and a different time zone away. If you're like I was, I feel for you, and I want to offer my truly humble and sincere advice. I'm not an expert, but I am a fellow yearner. Every couple is different, but there are pieces of advice that I believe would help anyone:
1) Keep in contact with methods that work
There are so many things you can do to keep in contact with your sweetheart... Skype, Facebook, blog, chat, talk on the phone, make countdowns, letters, care packages, and greetings cards are all good ways to keep in figurative touch. While technology offers a lot of ways to communicate, they might not all be right for you. For instance, many people think that Skype is a wonderful alternative to seeing your significant other, but I found it frustrating, awkward, and hollow. For me phone calls, with their warmth and portability, were a treat. Greeting cards were a giant delight and don't even get me started on the wonders of a well executed care package. Find the corner of communication that works for you, and do it in your own quirky way so that keeping in contact feels tailor made.

2) Make sweet unexpected gestures

Make plans, send little gifts, or write an unexpected letter. Sweet surprises are twice as great when they come from far away because they take more effort.

3) Balance. Don't forget about the rest of your life!
When my boyfriend comes to visit, the only way I can describe what happens next is that I lose my mind and want to throw away the rest of my life. I can't study, don't want to see my other friends, and basically ditch the rest of my life to spend the next few days with him. It can feel like you're entitled to spend all the time you have with them but it'll hurts the people around you. Balance, don't go overboard.

4) Enjoy the benefits of distance.

Space is nice. It's fun to discover the little ways the other person has grown in the few months or weeks they've been away. Long distance relationships have a lot of unique benefits.

Keep at it, and best of luck!
Happy Hearts!
Jennifer Hoang Group 13 ;)

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